Walmart advises laid-off employees to avoid chocolate, alcohol

The company’s resource packet given to the 2,200 workers who recently lost their jobs due to “plumbing issues” went public, and critics weighed in. 

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Layoffs are never easy, but the average axed employee can likely do without condescending advice from faceless corporations.

Such is the case with Walmart, which recently closed five stores due to “severe plumbing issues,” according to Business Insider. When the company let go of the 2,200 employees associated with those stores, it provided some tips to help cope with being let go.

Among the company’s stress management tips were several bullet points, including:

Care for yourself by eating well, exercising, and resting when needed. Avoid stimulants such as caffeine, chocolate and nicotine and depressants such as alcohol.

I’ve frequented several Walmart stores in my day, and after being surrounded by the fluorescent lights and the aisle after aisle of low-budget crap every day, I can say that if they left me in a lurch I would need caffeine to motivate me to wake up, chocolate to remind me that life isn’t as awful as it seems, nicotine to remind myself that I need to keep breathing and alcohol to make it all go away.

In other words, there’s zero chance I—or any free-willed former Walmartian—would follow this advice.

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