Let your LGBTQ+ employees come out on their own terms

It’s a chilly 65 degrees in my college dorm, but I’m sweating as I sit through my Zoom call. I’ve just joined the executive board for a club I’m in, and our team is meeting for the first time. We’re doing a diversity, equity and inclusion exercise, and I must decide if I’m going to come out.

The process of coming out is not new to me, but this type of pressure is. Our director of DE&I has asked us to introduce ourselves with our names and three facts related to our identity. It’s a simple task meant to help us get to know each other and celebrate our differences.

Yet, it terrifies me.

To begin with, I’m not ready to celebrate differences with this group of people yet. Rather, as we’re meeting for the first time, I want to bond over what has brought us together and establish trust with each other. But more than this, the term “identity” feels targeted toward discussions of sexuality and gender. People often say that they “identify” as queer or trans, and I certainly see my bisexuality as a part of who I am. Hearing that I am expected to talk about my identity makes me wonder if I should be sharing this part of me.